Tag: unstoppable

3:45AM

I was startled awake at 3:45am this morning. I awoke to pure darkness. I had stayed up until midnight so it took me about 10 seconds to gather my bearings.

It sounded like a large animal charging, maybe it was our German Shepherd Andrew or perhaps a moose. But, then I heard the familiar squeals and giggles of my 8 year old son Stalen. He burst into the bedroom running at full tilt and laughing. He was lugging his toy story pillow. He had clearly thought this out! He threw it into the bed and then jumped in after it. The giggles were louder and more intense now.

I turned on a bedside light and thought to myself…..way too early as the Toy Story pillow perhaps deliberately, smacked me right in the face. He quickly placed it beside my head and there he was. Smiling at me as if he just returned from a very long trip and hadn’t seen me in months.

As I said “go to sleep buddy”, he reached over and pretended to steal my nose and throw it out of the bed into oblivion, just as I had pretended to do to him on Thursday in the middle of the apple orchard. Then he laughed like he had pulled the ultimate prank and in a way he had at 3:50am. But, I’m sure it was really a lesson in ultimate payback for my antic with his nose earlier this week.

And with a gigantic sigh I thought to myself….awake at 4am on a Saturday but at least we never wake up late or boring.

Perspective is everything. 😂

With Severe Impairment

The words never get easier. They sting across my face as I read them, transcending from my eyes to my lips.

“with severe impairment”

There they are written as though they mean nothing and everything. The words that bring supports and services and perhaps an explanation that may present an increased understanding from the outside world. We see these words in reports, on assessments, in textbooks and in applications. They are rarely spoken outright because they imply huge limitations.

Yet, give him an iPad and he can tell a funny joke, trace letters, count, make a playlist and text it to me, purchase an app, send a text and ask for a piece of granola or a foot rub please.

It’s kind of like a sunny day. You can tell someone it’s sunny but that doesn’t describe the entire day. They can’t feel the warm heat of the sun, taste the lemonade that quenches your thirst or hear the laughter of kids playing in the sprinkler nearby.

You can’t tell an entire story in just 3 words…

Severe impairment may imply limitations but it doesn’t do any justice to describing the boy that I love and adore. Stalen is funny in the coolest way. While humor may come naturally to many of us through our words and actions imagine how difficult it is to be funny when your non-speaking and have major gross/fine motor delays that affect your ability to complete some body movements and tasks. Yet, he is undeniably funny. He is also charming, kind, loving, adventurous, and handsome with the best laugh, biggest smiles and hugs.

Stalen rises every day beyond the limitations imposed by conditions and a diagnosis.
These words “severe impairment” are only limiting if we believe and allow them to be.

While limitations may exist in the mind and on paper…..

there are no severe limitations of the heart.

Every beat is an opportunity for love and a pulse for great potential. His rhythm is one of love, joy and purpose to spread good in this world.

So, let this be another chapter in the story of the little boy who rises above and is more than any report, assessment or textbook definition.

As always, don’t judge a book by its cover or someone’s story by the the chapter you walked in on …

That’s Not the Case For Us

Without any hesitation I can say that my son has made me the mother I am today.

He has made me strong and brave as he has allowed me to come along with him as he faces his challenges in the same way.

He has increased my awareness that everyone is beautifully different and capable.

He has helped me to find the joy in each day.

He has shown me an appreciation for the simple things.

He has taught me the importance of kindness, patience, and understanding.

He has shown me that words and actions do matter, especially those directed towards someone else.

He has taught me that there is more than one way to communicate and more than one way to do most anything.

He has taught me that it is okay to have hard days and bad days.

He has shown me an appreciation for things that I used to take for granted like the warmth of the sun, the tickle of the wind and grand adventures.

He has shown me the power of hope, love and positive thinking.

He has taught me that you can still go through hell and smile.

I’m an improved version of who I once was.

He has made me better. He pushes me to be the best version of myself every day.

I read a quote recently and it said,

“ men are what their mothers made them”.

But, that’s not the case for us.

In the Community….

Stalen just stopped by Autism Connections Fredericton and donated $100 from the proceeds of his book ”Jokes Are For Everyone!”

Autism Connections Fredericton is one of our favorite places and they have provided so much support, encouragement, and programming to us over the years. They do amazing things in our community!!! ❤️

Stalen is waving hi from Oromocto & Surrounding Area Food Bank

Stalen stopped by and donated $100 to the Food Bank from the proceeds of his joke book, “Jokes Are For Everyone!”

The Oromocto & Surrounding Area Food Bank helps so many individuals and families in our community. Thank you for the important work that you do!

Stalen also donated $65 to sponsor a Christmas dinner for a local family from his book sales.

Way to go Stalen! Keep spreading your kindness in the community.

Stalen’s Way

He is vibrant happiness.

He is the smile of hope.

He is more than any diagnosis, challenge, barrier or obstacle.

In the face of a limit, he is the little boy who could.

I hope that he reminds people of the potential of love and infinite possibility.

That is Stalen’s Way

My Sunshine Boy

Choose joy.
Choose happy.
Choose to shine.

I don’t know many people who have such an appreciation and love for the feel of the wind on their face. Most people scoff at the wind and how it may be cold, mess up their hair or blow things away.

This picture is the epitome of joy.

I believe that there are some special people walking this earth that are filled with such joy for life, that it shines from them and radiates around others. The purpose of these special people is not the things that they will do in their lifetime, but the lives that they will touch. They touch others not through words or action, but rather through how they choose to live. They choose happiness and joy, appreciate simplicity and see beauty in everything even beyond the surface.

My sunshine boy is like this….

He sees and feels the world with his whole heart. He lives joy every day. When joy doesn’t exist he creates his own.

I aspire to be more like him.

You Need This Book In Your Life…

Forever Boy is officially out today!!!

Forever Boy by Kate Swenson may appear on the surface to be the story of a Mom with an autistic child. But, it is so much more than that!

It is the inspiring story of a Mom navigating an autism diagnosis, seeking supports, inclusion and education for her child, while also navigating motherhood, marriage, relationships, personal struggle, sorrow, hope and joy.

Kate and her son Cooper are an amazing example of a great unconditional love between a mother and her child.

The world needed this book and so did so many moms, families and caregivers. Kate’s memoir is the validation of so many unspoken battles that families face when trying to get the supports and services that their autistic loved ones need and deserve.

This must read-can’t put it down-page turner will leave you feeling seen, heard and rejuvenated to push forward to find the hope and joy in your own struggles and journey.

Whether you are a parent, friend, family member, or professional who wants to learn more and understand both the internal and external challenges of raising a child with autism….Forever Boy has something for everyone!

Thank you Kate for showing us we are not alone, and for your willingness to bravely sit in the dark with so many on similar paths.

Learning to Fly

Sometimes you have to take a leap of faith….

Yesterday I had to get 4 items at the grocery store. I decided to bring Stalen with me and have him free moving without a Caroline’s cart and without any expectations.

It was a workout but he did so well. He only tried to run off twice and he was quite interested in what others had in their carts. 😂

He helped me bag the green pepper. He lifted the bananas in the cart. He pushed the cart for a couple of seconds to see what it was like.

Everyone deserves to have opportunities to learn and grow. Everyone deserves opportunities to be active and involved in their communities.

For us it’s about progress over perfection. Next time we will try to go for 5 items.

Leaps of faith are important because they help you push past limits and try new things.

They help you build independence.

Until you spread your wings, you will have no idea how far you can fly.

My boy loves to fly.